What’s in my Mailbox | Senior Services new donor welcome kit

October 22, 2014

Whatsinmymailbox

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I recently donated online to Senior Services in Seattle, WA as part of my ‘Two Gifts a Week’ mystery shopping experiment, and received this direct mail welcome in response.  It includes:

  1. a thank you letter
  2. a four-page brochure
  3. reply envelope
  4. response device/monthly giving invitation

First off, kudos to Senior Services for implementing a welcome kit and acknowledging my gift.

How could this welcome kit be strengthened?

The Letter:

All it takes are a few simple tweaks from my Basic Thank You Letter Template to create a letter that’s warm and engaging…and lets the donor know you couldn’t do it without them.

Instead of the generic ‘Thank you for supporting Senior Services,’ how about:

A wise man once said, “Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be.” Your recent donation to Senior Services has already gone to work ensuring that over 371,000 seniors in King County live their later years to the fullest. Thank you for caring so very much.

Instead of “The enclosed brochure…” why not:

If you’d like to learn more about Senior Services, check out the enclosed…

In other words: more ‘you,’ less ‘us.’

The letter is addressed ‘Dear Friend.’ Using their first name always lends a personal and caring touch.

Indented paragraphs and a serif font would add to the friendliness factor and make it more accessible.

It’s missing a contact person with a direct phone number or email.

The Brochure:

The back of the brochure, featuring a pie chart of how your gift is used, the vivid photographs, and the focus on the donor is the best part of this piece.

That said, I don’t believe in brochures.  They’ve even been shown to decrease fundraising results.  Consider instead an evergreen newsletter created exclusively for first time donors and loaded with stories. We recently featured a terrific one from Nashville Rescue Mission.

Lastly, do you include an ask in a thank you letter? This is a hotly debated topic in the nonprofit community. And, yes, I know it supposedly ‘works.’ But I’m not a fan. Instead, I recommend calling first time donors, sending out a thank you letter that is absolutely oozing with gratitude, and following up within the first 2-3 weeks with your welcome kit, which may include an ask.  I would not, however, have an everything but the kitchen sink approach.  Depending on your mission, your welcome kit could provide the ideal opportunity for a monthly giving ask.

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